What’s that Ability?

Wilhelm's post today about Everquest 2 included a shot of his hotbars on the character he has been leveling recently.  I know I was curious and confused by many of the icons, so as a public service I will interpret the many skills here shown.



1) Throw Paper Airplane
2) Duel
3) Moonwalk
4) Deep Hurting
5) One Sword
6) Two Sword
7) Red Sword
8) Discuss Punching
9) Deeper Hurting
0) Punish Villager
-) Replace Cart Wheel
=) J'accuse!

Alt 1) Start Horse
Alt 2) Defrost Windshield
Alt 3) Visine
Alt 4) Display Pecs
Alt 5) Super Saiyan
Alt 6) Boot to Head
Alt 7) Bitch Slap
Alt 8) Pimp Slap
Alt 9) Palmolive
Alt 0) Apply Makeup
Alt -) Dance Around Maypole
Alt =) Blue Sword

Ctrl 1) Contemplate Hand
Ctrl 2) Alien Abduction
Ctrl 3) Beam Me Up!
Ctrl 4) Buckle Belt
Ctrl 5) Remove Staple
Ctrl 6) Replace Pad
Ctrl 7) Flashdance
Ctrl 8) Drink Heavily
Ctrl 9) Rail Against Heavens
Ctrl 0) Become Pope
Ctrl -) Add Ice Cube
Ctrl =) I Don't Know

There, isn't that better?