Good morning friends… or at least it is still morning as I sit down to start writing this post. I have been struggling the last few days to find purpose when it comes to making a post. As of last Friday I am officially on Christmas break until the new year and finding it hard to keep any semblance of normal pattern going. We’ve been running around and scrambling to do the last things needed to do before the holiday proper and knocking off various things from our list. The biggest of these was dealing with some big expenditures yesterday. Namely my wife has needed new tires on her vehicle for awhile, and like everything else… the price of new tires has gone through the roof. Lastly we had to settle up the very large bill that comes with having a cat in the hospital under constant care for a week.
This last bit really destroyed my forward momentum for the day and I spent the rest of the day being very sad about losing Kenzie again. This ended up translating unfortunately into me being angry about everything all day long… because I sometimes have trouble translating sadness into an emotion that I can deal with on a day to day basis. It is so much easier to feel angry at the little things than accept that I am mired in being completely wrecked still from losing my baby girl. It does not help that both Mollie and Josie have been acting weird… with Mollie pretty much living exclusively upstairs, and Josie living exclusively downstairs. I had hoped that maybe Mollie would ease up and come out of her shell a bit since Kenzie was an antagonistic force. Instead it is almost as though Mollie has reverted back to the kitty who wouldn’t snuggle with us.
In our travels yesterday we went to Gardner’s books, which is a massive used bookstore here in Tulsa. If you are ever in the vicinity, you should totally check it out especially if you are a bibliophile. One of my favorite things are these two Star Wars action figure statutes, that are effectively 6 foot tall versions of the Kenner toy line from my childhood. I am pretty certain that at one point they had a Luke and an Obi Wan but I didn’t see them when roaming the store. This place is just so damned weird and eclectic with an odd blend of lots of different “geek” things all thrown into a single store. I noticed that they suddenly have some Warhammer 40k stuff when I don’t remember them ever having miniatures in the past. They have always been a great source for old RPG source books and such, but I really never know what I am going to find there on each subsequent visit.
As far as gaming goes, I am finding myself playing mostly Final Fantasy VII Remake on the PC. I seem to go through this thing at the end of the year where I mostly play a bunch of single player titles. I should be fighting my way through the queue in Final Fantasy XIV and working on getting my gear score up there… but just the act of needing to plan my play times rather than pop in at a moments notice is sorta harshing my Endwalker buzz. What makes this even more tragic is my friend Grace seems to be super into the game again… and I really need to figure out how to relight my spark in order to do some fun group time activities.
Instead I am finding it way more my speed to chill out and play some single player Final Fantasy instead. FF7R is pretty great and I greatly appreciate the action feel to it. I know that is a point of contention for some folks, but right now… at this very moment it seems to be the sort of game I need. I am hoping I can snap out of this funk that is circulating around me, because I do want to be out there and active for everyone. It isn’t like I have development my mental block around tanking, because I am perfectly find random queuing for activities. It is just that my mental patterns are flowing in a way as to greatly enjoy Destiny 2 and FF7R right now… and less so FFXIV. Here is hoping that changes throughout the break. I never did beat FF7R so I would like to do that maybe now that I have some more time on my hands.
The post Christmas Doldrums appeared first on Tales of the Aggronaut.
Good Morning Friends! I am very much in vacation mode right now because I am off work until the New Year. As we wind down things for 2021, I usually end up starting to think about what is going to be releasing next year. More specifically since months fly by so quickly… I am focused on the games we already have release dates for during the first quarter of 2022. In an attempt to make content happen without talking about Endwalker spoilers… I thought I would spend some time this morning going over some of the upcoming releases that I specifically care about.
Weird West
Technically this is already available if you are interested in playing early access. What really interests me about this game is how much it looks like a classic Fallout game, that is set in the wild west… but with vampires and zombies and such. Essentially two folks from Arkane left to found a new studio and the game is being published by Devolver Digital… which usually means it is going to be some nonsense. I’ve been waiting for awhile for this game to officially launch and I am ready to spend a bit roaming around this setting.
January 11th – Windows, PlayStation, Xbox (Game Pass)
Monster Hunter Rise
I get that this has been out for half a year now on the Nintendo Switch, but truth be told… my “console” of choice is likely always going to be the PC. Since I never really got into Monster Hunter Rise before now, I am hoping to give it a spin when it releases on Steam. I’ve played the demo and it controls pretty much like Monster Hunter World did, which felt far better on PC for me personally than it did on console. Mouse and Keyboard makes everything better for me, so hoping that it gives me the desire to actually play the game and experience it all.
January 12th – PC Release – Already available on Switch
Dying Light 2 Stay Human
I loved Dying Light. It was such a great take on the Zombie game and was way more detailed and engaging than I expected it. Since this was first announced I have been waiting for it to release, and now it finally is coming out. This has had an extremely fraught release schedule and gone through development hell… so I have to say I am a bit concerned about how good of a game it is going to be when we finally get our hands on it. I am a sucker for this sort of game though so I figure I am going to be on board for trying it regardless of how big of a mess it might end up being. I mean I loved Cyberpunk 2077 and Mass Effect Andromeda when the rest of society seemed to be panning them as awful… so my tastes may be slightly different than the zeitgeist.
February 4th – Windows, PlayStation, Xbox, Nintendo Switch
Horizon Forbidden West
This friends is why I own a PlayStation 5, pure and simple. Horizon Zero Dawn was my favorite game of the PlayStation 4 generation, and I am so ready to join Aloy on another adventure. I wish this was coming out on PC at the same time as the PS4/PS5 versions but I know I will probably double dip on this title and play it again when the PC version eventually releases. I enjoyed this so much more with a Keyboard and Mouse, but I was able to enjoy every last minute of it with a controller as well so regardless… I am so damned ready to be revisiting this world.
February 18th – PlayStation 4/5
Destiny 2: Witch Queen
I have to admit that I had all but sworn off this expansion for Destiny 2. I am still annoyed at the vaulting of content, however after coming back to the game recently I have had this whole experience of just how damned fun it can be. There is an almost truly oppressive amount of content that is relevant, so I guess I now sorta get why they are vaulting some of it because it really is almost too much stuff to juggle. I might be a sucker, but I guess I am now on board for this nonsense.
February 22nd – Windows, PlayStation, Xbox, Stadia, Luna
Elden Ring
I have to admit I am not fully bought into this game. I am nowhere near as hyped as everyone else seems to be. I don’t really like souls games in general but I do really like the world surrounding them. Open World games are my jam and I am curious if the souls formula will work for me… when in a big damned exploration game. I am still not certain if I am going to be playing this game, but it is definitely on my radar at least to be watching.
February 25th – Windows, PlayStation, Xbox
Tunic
This honestly is one of the games that I am looking forward to full stop. Tunic is essentially the original Legend of Zelda with a super cute fox character. I’ve played the demo for this game and have waited and watched as it got subtle updates each year… until now we finally have a release date. If you loved the original Legend of Zelda, maybe give this game a look.
March 16th – Windows, Mac, Xbox
Tiny Tina’s Wonderlands
So this is one of those games that I am interested in… but maybe not as hyped as some folks are about it. I feel like Tiny Tina is a character that is great in small doses… but can be a bit much at times. I think I am going to dig a Borderlands game but with Melee and Magic. I did not really enjoy Borderlands 3, so that also gives me pause because I am not exactly sure that Gearbox has the same magic that they once did. However I did really like the latest trailer so here is hoping it ends up being phenomenally fun.
March 25th – Windows, PlayStation, Xbox
Guild Wars 2: End of Dragons
Me and Guild Wars 2 have had a fraught history. The next expansion is coming soon, and I know I will probably give it a spin to see if it grabs me. There is a lot about this expansion that looks interesting, but also I know how much I have generally bounced off Guild Wars 2. So we will see if this one does it for me.
Early 2022 Release Date – Windows
What did I end up missing that you are anxiously looking forward to? I really only covered the first few months of 2022 since so many other games don’t have definite launch windows. I would love to hear the games you are looking forward to. Drop me a line below.
The post Games of Early 2022 appeared first on Tales of the Aggronaut.
Good Morning Friends. If you have followed me on twitter, you probably already know that I am in a pretty broken state right now. I’ve talked a bit on this blog about the recent challenges with Kenzie and I figured I owed it to anyone who ONLY reads my blog to give an update. Kenzie was diagnosed with diabetes in 2017, and from that point forward we have had a nightly routine of “pill and poke” where I feed her some anti-anxiety meds and also give her the nightly shot of insulin. I am so thankful that she took it well throughout the years, because it is hard to fully explain how much of “my” baby Kenzie was. For most of her life she was my partner in crime and was with me constantly. She trusted “daddy” explicitly and knew that I would never do anything that wasn’t extremely necessary for her own benefit. So giving two insulin shots a day, often times caused dirty looks but never any real resistance.
Statistically once a cat is diagnosed with diabetes, the average life expectancy is three years. We managed to get a bit more than four years with Kenzie and I have to say every moment of it was worth it. She was still very much “herself” until last week. I woke up Monday morning and knew something was wrong but wasn’t quite sure what. At first I thought maybe Kenzie was just having a bad day, and she spent most of it curled up in my office. Tuesday she was even more sluggish and we made a doctors appointment for her to be dropped off Wednesday morning. From that point forward she was essentially in hospital care. We don’t know what happened first but theory is… her blood sugar was just a bit off which lead to a bladder infection… which led to diabetic ketoacidosis… which lead to pancreatitis… all of which stressed her liver.
She was starting to go the right direction… when tragedy struck Saturday afternoon and she suffered some form of stroke causing a major setback. At the same time she was going into liver failure and ultimately had to make the call no one ever wants to make. Thankfully I got to snuggle with her one last time, but the entire time she was making these little pained noises while still trying push her head underneath my hand. I am just so heartbroken right now. I’ve lost many animals in my forty five years, but Kenzie meant so much to me that it is very hard to fully express in words. She was a mess… but she was my mess. I had never had a cat that played fetch before, and many a Sunday morning while I was editing AggroChat she would be meowing insistently for me to throw a hairband which was her fetch object of choice. As we started doing telework, she spent so many hours curled up beside me on a PC Case box that I let sit there long enough that she started to use it as a place to sleep.
Right now I am also a bit concerned for Josie, because Kenzie and her were buds. Kenzie had never liked another cat before Josie joined our family. She was part big sister and part surrogate mom to Josie and it was not that unusual for them both to be snuggling on my legs while I sat and played on my laptop. Kenzie and Mollie however did not get along at all… and part of the reason why Mollie tiptoed throughout the house is to skirt the attention of Kenzie. So it will be interesting to see what life is like with Mollie in the coming weeks, and if she may come a bit out of her shell. I’ve had both of them snuggling with me during the weekend because I think they can tell that I am not quite right. Cats seem to know when you need them the most. Losing an animal is never easy, but losing Kenzie is extra hard.
The Vet fought a hard fight over the course of several days and I am extremely thankful for everything they were able to do. I have no clue just how much this bill is going to be yet, but I would have probably paid any amount to keep her safe and at my side. I keep going through this cycle of trying to figure out if I could have done something different, second guessing every decision I made over the past week. The Vet has tried to assure me there wasn’t much else that I could have done, but I also sorta feel like that is part of their job to try and assuage fears. There will always be part of me that feels like I failed to keep her safe and happy, and it even hits home more so since so much of my daily routine centered around trying to keep her alive. I think I am going to be broken for a long while, but I am very thankful for all of the support that you gave me. I do sorta think things have to scab over a bit before I can really engage fully with the world again.
One thing that does bring me no small amount of joy is the fact that Kenzie is permanently part of my blog’s Masthead. When I was playing Monster Hunter World I tried my best to pattern my Palico after Kenzie and named her as such. The truth is that the options were completely incapable of capturing her, so when I asked my good friend Ammo to create artwork of my MHW character, I got her to draw the Palico to look a bit more true to the actual Kenzie. So every time I make a post I will have Kenzie up there, preparing to go to space in her adorable Baan armor set. Goodbye baby, you were a goofball but you were my goofball. I miss you so much.
The post Goodbye Kenzie appeared first on Tales of the Aggronaut.
Good Morning Friends. This isn’t exactly the sort of post that I am going to be syndicating but also since this blog often acts as therapy… I am going to talk about it. This is Kenzie, she is my partner in crime and has been my baby since we rescued her in 2014. She is not doing well and as soon as the vet opens I will be taking her there this morning. Saturday and Sunday she acted like her normal mess of a self, and then starting Monday she was extremely lethargic showing no real interest in food. Yesterday we called and were able to make an appointment for this morning, but I am scared to death that I did not make the right call and should have tried to find pet urgent care yesterday.
She is not doing well this morning. It seems like everything takes a lot of effort for her to do. I made her a water dish so that she didn’t have to go far for water, and she ended up knocking it over this morning. She relocates periodically and seems to be moving okay when this happens, but it is like she has no energy at all. I am scared to death as to what might be going on, and thinking we should have taken her somewhere sooner. This morning she has her appointment so I guess I kept telling myself that we already had that and that she would be okay until then. Her breathing isn’t labored and if you did not know that she was in normally constant motion, you would think she was just tired.
I just want my baby girl to be okay. she has a lot of complications and some years back she developed diabetes. So I give her insulin every morning and evening through one of those clicky pens. That could be getting worse and I noticed she had been losing some weight, which was what had accompanied when we needed to increase her dosage last time. We needed to get her into the vet anyway but life has just been rough lately. I am scared that I fucked up and that my indecision will have caused permanent damage. This is a deeply personal post, but I would greatly appreciate it if you keep her in your thoughts today. Now that I have finished with this I will be bundling her up in the carrying cage and taking her to the vet hoping and praying that maybe just maybe they can help her out.
The post Thoughts for Kenzie appeared first on Tales of the Aggronaut.
