Reconciling Sins

Good Afternoon Folks. This is going to be a bit of a trying week. Due to age and neglect… I have been dealing with a bunch of things all at once. When I made the radical decision around the start of the year to live my life, rather than simply waiting to die… that came with it a bunch of adult problems that I needed to deal with. Some of these were put in place well before now, for example last Friday I saw a Cardio doctor and while I will be doing a battery of tests in the coming weeks, was largely given a relatively clean bill of health other than high blood pressure. They made sweeping changes to my drug regimen and for the most part it seems to have wildly improved things. Today is the first day I am wearing some old man socks, aka compression socks in an attempt to combat one of the other residual effects that I had been dealing with. I would say not to get old… but the alternative is not great either. I think the better option is to not get old while fat and in relative disrepair. Another thing that I have been dealing with this week is finally getting brave and going to the Dentist. It had been somewhere in the neighborhood of twenty years since I last went into the dentist for a routine cleaning. I’ve always been more than a little terrified of Dentists in general, and the longer I waited… the less opportune the end result was going to be. Bel luck prevailed however because apparently my teeth are still in pretty solid shape without yearly attention. However there are some problems that are going to have to be dealt with, like the fact that my lower front teeth have migrated all over the fucking place and should probably be aligned back up in some semblance of order. That will require some sort of dental appliance and time in order to get the desired results, and with that will come a heck of a lot of money I am sure. The other big thing that I am dealing with this week… is another thing that was set in motion some time ago. I am going in for my first colonoscopy, and within a few hours I will be starting the prep work by consuming the first of two doses of what I have been told is truly vile liquid. After that I will become close personal friends with my toilet for a number of hours. Then I will have to get up in the morning and repeat the process. Once again… highly do not suggest this getting old thing. This is honestly what I am most terrified of, because I know they will be putting me under for it. In high school I had a sinus surgery and had some pretty negative effects of the anesthesia, so I guess I am sitting down to write this afternoon so that if something does happen you know what occurred. Since I keep my internet life and my real world life relatively separate, I have created some contacts for my folks to reach out to in the event of anything happening. They will I am sure get the broader word out. I don’t mean to sound alarmist, but I also did not expect my spouse of thirty years to suddenly drop dead last year. That set me on this whole path of reconciling the sins of the past, and trying to take better care of myself. There is someone that I care about quite a bit, that is also part of the driving force of dealing with any lingering problems. I am hoping tomorrow goes quickly enough, and that nothing major is found. Given that my father has had a whole slew of digestive tract problems, I would not be shocked if I do as well. Hopefully they will all be things that can be mitigated, and nothing super serious. I am not the biggest fan of this whole aging thing, but I am trying to engage in better habits that will hopefully see me through for awhile. If I take after my Dad’s line, they seem to be pretty long lived… and with a bit of Bel Luck sprinkled in hopefully I will as well. Basically I am writing today because I am not sure how much I will be able to write over the coming days. I have no clue how much of a toll this will take out of me. My dad was apparently loopy for over a day after getting out of his last colonoscopy. I know tomorrow morning I will be dealing with another round of prep, and then tomorrow night… I am probably going to be exhausted and hangry since I am on a liquid only diet currently. I sincerely doubt you will be hearing from me tomorrow, but I will attempt to make a post on social media when I am free and clear of it all. Thursday is a total crapshoot as of how I will be feeling. I am hoping I will bounce back quickly and will have things to talk about at that point. Regardless I feel the need to say that if anything happens to me, I have enjoyed our time together. It has been weird sharing my life with you all, at least in a limited fashion. Hopefully I am remembered fondly, and hopefully all of this is viewed as being deeply dramatic. I would have rather said things and not needed to, than to have disappeared without a word. Yall have been a major part of my life for going on seventeen years at this point. Be kind to each other, because if nothing else I would like to be remembered as caring about so many of you. The post Reconciling Sins appeared first on Tales of the Aggronaut.