Hibernation Season

Hiding Out

Every now and then I go through these periods where I run away from the groups and games that require me to interact with other people and for lack of a better term “hide out”.  They are usually paired with a period of high stress in my life, and I guess the current work stress mixed with the life stress of a bunch of big things looming on the horizon… could count as that.  I also just went to the doctor and found out that I am dangerously low on Vitamin D.  Generally speaking a healthy range is between 30 and 70 and on the test I came back with a score of like 10.  Vitamin D effects all sorts of things… not the least of which is mental health and mood, so I would not be surprised if all of the bouts of depression were related to that chemical deficiency in particular.  I am taking some insane 50,000 unit Vitamin D supplements once a week to help balance me out again, but I am still in the thrall of that desire to hide away from the rest of the world.

I think in part this is why I have not really been around in Final Fantasy XIV much because I have helped to build this wonderful and interactive world…  that likes me being around.  So when I am around I feel obligated to interact and be friendly…. and right now that is just too much of a drain on me.  Similarly I have an issue with Wildstar because the Black Dagger Society is so damned friendly that I feel like an asshole if I am not also friendly back.  As a result I end up playing a lot of Diablo III because I can get lost in a private game without the feeling of needing to reciprocate too many social graces.  This is definitely a me thing and not due to any of the amazing people in my life.  I am broken, and every now and then I just need to retreat inside myself until I am “less broken”.   What I do when I am like this is hang out downstairs and binge television shows.  I don’t really watch TV on a regular basis apart from Walking Dead/Fear the Walking Dead which becomes Monday morning water cooler discussion at work.  I am what is wrong with broadcast television…  I either record a show or watch it from a combination of hulu/netflix/amazon prime.  The concept of watching a television show as it airs just seems so damned strange to me now.  The problem being…  I am the reason why good shows get seen as failures…  because they are designed for people like me…  not the nightly television viewing public.

The Strain

Hibernation Season

Awhile back one of my coworkers told me about the show The Strain.  The problem with not watching television is that you also don’t really find out when a show is on the air.  I love movies and television shows about things that go bump in the night, and as such I have a deep respect for the director Guillermo Del Torro.  This show is apparently an adaptation of a graphic novel by the same title from 2009.  There is really no disguising the fact that this is a vampire show… but not one in the Ventrue/Toreador tradition that we have seen Hollywood obsessed with lately.  These are the Malkavians and Nosferatu that hide in the shadows.  This show brings back a return to “vampires as monsters” instead of “vampires and glittery swoony boyfriend material”.  The problem is I am not sure how much more of the plot that I want to give away other than that.  Suffice to say you end up with a badass team of Vampire Hunters, lead by a grizzled old Van Helsing type that is played by none other than “Argus Filtch” aka David Bradley.  The show has a very “zombie apocalypse” feel to it, but with smarter hunters stalking their prey rather than the mindless oppression of a world constantly looking for food.  If you like the monster genre, I highly suggest you check it out.  Even if you don’t normally like monster movies…  it might be worth your time because the characters are really excellent and with their own interesting flaws.  The first season is available on Hulu, and the show has been picked up for a second season.

Constantine

Hibernation Season

 

Constatine might be the “least NBC” television show I have ever watched.  I am not really sure what the network executives were thinking when they greenlit this show…. but honestly it was not destined for broadcast television.  The show developed a very small but fanatically devoted following… and honestly after finishing the first season I can see why.  Sadly watching this show I felt pangs of regret… because I am part of the reason why the show never got a second season.  I recorded it on my DVR and then binge watched it months after the show was cancelled.  This is going to be another Firefly/Space Above and Beyond regret for me…  because really the show is quite amazing.  It does an excellent job of presenting the character of John Constantine with all of his flaws…  and virtues.  They did a much better job with the casting this time around than the Keanu Reeves movie….  which while they failed miserably at Constantine did a pretty damned good job of capturing the setting.  I am still holding out hope that someone might pick this up as a Netflix, Hulu or Amazon exclusive.  They have already announced that the character of John Constantine would be appearing regularly on Arrow, so there is at least hope keeping this franchise alive.  Placing this show on NBC however…. was just destined to fail.  I think had it even appeared on the NBC Universal owned USA network… it might have found a home.

Killjoys

Hibernation Season

 

This show…  took me a few episodes before I got into it…  but now I am currently watching my way through it and I love it.  What it reminds me of is Firefly… but a show set in a different corner of that universe.  In Firefly you were out on the outer rim of society…  in a lawless wild west simulacrum.  This show instead is about the bounty hunters operating in and out of the core worlds, the Killjoys.  So far the show has spent equal time on and off of civilized worlds, and as it progresses there is an interesting world emerging.  The bulk of the show is set in an area of space known as the Quad… which is a planet orbited by three dwarf planets.  Qresh being the central planet ruled by the nine families, and between them is an unsteady peace…  along with comes a very brutally cold war.  Westerly gives you a big barren wasteland world, that was exploited by the “The Company” for natural resources and then sometimes nuked from orbit when the worker class rebelled.  Lieth is the farmland world, filled with “indentured servant” farms and their own share of illegal farming going on.  Finally you have Arkyn that so far in the series we have not heard much about… other than the fact that something went really wrong there… and folks tend to call it a “dead world”.  I am only about halfway through the first season and I have to say I am loving it.  The first episode does not do a great job of really showcasing the feel of the show so I would say give it at least three before you decide if you like it or not.  As soon as I wrap this up I plan on returning to watching the show…  which is available through Hulu… but you have to connect to your cable provider to grant access to it…  and have to play it through a web browser.  Both of these things I find annoying but I am dealing with it.  What are some of your most recent favorite shows?

Investing in the Experience

There is an old game development philosophy, now considered outdated, that suggests that players should have to ‘earn’ their fun in a game. It’s the source of the “grind”, and it’s where the idea of pitifully weak low-level characters who grow to be powerful comes from. A lot of games have their really fun, exciting levels a little ways in, and in older arcade games, you’d have to be really good or pump in a lot of quarters to reach them.

Investing in the Experience

You can pretty easily see when and where it fell out of favor, and in which genres. RPGs made you work your way through quite a bit of experience before you had interesting abilities and weapons. First-person shooters made you go through several levels with very simple weapons before you got to play with anything really cool. MMORPGs would make you spend weeks or months fighting boars and wolves before getting powerful enough to even fight an enemy of a player race, much less something big like a griffon or dragon.

I’ve seen this elsewhere as well– I’ve talked before about certain TV shows having really slow or confusing opening episodes, which set up significant payoffs later on down the line. It’s something I’ve noticed an incredible amount of in anime, and while I don’t watch as much American TV, quite a few people I know who watch a lot of it tell me the same is true there. Bel commented over the weekend that he doesn’t decide if he likes a show or not until four or five episodes in at least, and it’s a rule I’ve adopted for anime as well.

There’s a flip side to the concept of “earning” enjoyment out of a piece of entertainment. If you’re invested in an experience, you’re a lot more likely to enjoy it, and if you have to work to get that investment, you’re going to value it more. It’s a fairly straightforward bit of psychology that crops up pretty much everywhere, and it’s fairly clear here as well. Things that are easy to get into are also easy to get out of; the games and shows I remember the most about are the ones I had to do some work to get invested in, whereas the easy shows don’t tend to stick with me as much.

Investing in the Experience

As an example, I can’t really remember much about what happens in Azumanga Daioh, despite liking that show quite a bit when I watched it. It was easy to sit down and watch and while I have a vague recollection of it and I know it’s relatively simple, I can’t recall specifics even on rewatching episodes. On the other hand, in rewatching Baccano recently, I realized that I remembered pretty much everything that happened in the show, and with a brief memory jog could name characters and even specific scenes. Baccano is a much more complex, much less accessible show, and I had to put some effort into it. The payoff was fantastic, and it’s one of my favorite shows, but it requires that effort– that investment– to get the most out of it. Its spiritual successor, Durarara, had a similarly slow first episode, but once I got into it I was absolutely hooked, and it’s propelled itself easily into my top list of favorite shows.

I find myself seeking that investment in my entertainment– I want shows and games that I need to put a bit of effort into before they pay off. It’s something I’ve recently realized drives a lot of my interests; a lot of people like entertainment that they describe as “a way to turn my brain off”, and I’ve very rarely enjoyed that kind of experience. A lot of my friends are playing Diablo again recently, and it’s a game I’ve tried to like but don’t really enjoy most of the time– not because it isn’t fun, but because I don’t find it engaging and I get bored. In a similar vein, when I load up a new stealth game, I tend to crank the difficulty all the way up. I’d wondered why I do this, but it fits nicely into the idea of investing in the experience. It makes the game harder, so I have to work at it, and as a result I enjoy it more, because my victories feel more real. When I play minis games, I’ve put in the effort to acquire, assemble, and often paint the models I have, and in most cases I’ve constructed themes and narratives around them, so they feel weighty and meaningful.

Investing in the Experience

FFXIV has an incredibly slow start compared to other recent MMOs– it’s a LONG time before you’ve got a variety of cool abilities and even have the basic mechanics of the game unlocked– it’s level 30 at least, sometimes later, and your class doesn’t feel like a complete concept until 50 in many cases. There’s a ton of mandatory story and a lot of things you simply have to do in order to progress. One of the criticisms levelled at Heavensward was that you had to play through the entire story of the game, including all of the main story content patches, just to even access the expansion content. For a lot of people, this was a wall that they had to climb to get into the new, cool areas they just paid for. However, the story of FFXIV is so central to the experience that a lot of what happens in Heavensward would be either nonsensical or have no impact if you could skip all of that content. The game forces you to invest some time (and, to be fair, rewards you fairly well if you’d not previously done it) so that you’re in a position to appreciate the new content.

I’m tempted to say I’m torn on this– that on the one hand I really do value the experiences I didn’t instantly love but came to enjoy a lot more than the ones I liked from the start, but that I also despise grinding and doing repetitive, grindy content just to “get to the fun part”. I’m really not torn at all, though. The investment is valuable, it just needs to be applied properly. The show has to be well-written, or the game well-designed, so that there is a satisfying payoff after you put in the investment. It’s got to feel like your time and effort are respected.

Investing in the Experience

There’s a certain amount of trust that goes into it as well. You’ve got to be willing to trust that this thing you’re experiencing that seems like utter crap right now is going to all be worthwhile later. It’s a tall order, because we’re so inundated with quick, thoughtless entertainment experiences that aren’t trying to be thought-provoking or offer any payoff other than the immediate. There’s nothing inherently wrong with this kind of entertainment– it has its time and its place– but it’s very difficult to tell off the bat whether you’re dealing with something shallow or something deep until you’ve put a bit of time into it.

This isn’t to say that all meaningful, thought-provoking entertainment experiences have to be obtuse and inaccessible at first; what I *am* torn about is whether that’s a good idea. While it certainly forces me to put effort in, it’s also really good at losing me. I have to go digging for the hook, and sometimes it doesn’t seem like there’s going to be a hook to find.

Investing in the Experience

That having been said, my track record thus far with shows I haven’t liked at first but have put effort into is really great. Of the shows I’ve watched at least four episodes of this year, there’ve been two that I’m not enthused about watching more of, out of twenty or thirty by now. It’s a really good track record. Games have been starkly less good, though I think a lot of that is because my feelings on playing games has been changing since I stopped working on them, but it’s easy to fall into old “force yourself to play” habits.

Part of me is looking at the new Metal Gear Solid game– a series I haven’t played in a decade by now, and wondering if it’s worth the investment. Certainly I know a lot of people who are very into that series, and while it seems like inaccessible nonsense from the outside, I can’t help but wonder if there’s a solid (ha!) payoff for the invested player. I’ve got other games to play right now, and no disposable income for an MGS game, but still, I wonder.

Demon Hunting

Digital Resurrection

Demon Hunting
Not the Culprit, but a close cousin

Yesterday was the day of me bringing back machines from the dead.  During the week my secondary machine gave up the ghost, the one that I use to remote in from work on a regular basis and the one that I use to manage my media server.  I came home from work on Tuesday and and my second machine was screaming, literally.  Emitting an insanely loud noise, but I really did not have time to investigate it so I put that off until the weekend.  My immediate thought was the processor fan, and that the system had overheated.  Luckily I happened to have a spare one of these because I thought this processor fan had gone out before.  Turns out that when I popped it open on my table, it was not the processor fan at all but the video card.  The Asus 550 ti finally gave up the ghost and thankfully I have a whole slew of video cards to attempt.  So I threw in my lowest power consumption, lowest heat card…  which was a HD 7500 series card that came with an older machine that I replaced.  Sure enough machine booted up just fine and the box is working once again.

For my second act of machine resurrection I decided to go a bit further back.  In October 2014 my y500 laptop with SLI 650 gtx cards died.  Well died is the wrong term, because it simply just stopped booting.  It would hang on the Lenovo bios screen and refused to go any further.  After spending a few weeks without ANY help from Lenovo or any other source…  I ended up purchasing a really good deal of a laptop in a Lenovo y580 from Craigslist and moved on with my life.  Problem being…  this has been a bit of an obsession in my life.  Every few months I go on a binge of searching for other people who have had the same problem.  Numerous people had reported that it was the SSD, and when I cracked mine open I seemed to only have the one hard drive.  I even went so far as replacing the hard drive with another one that I had laying around and nothing.  Turns out there is a different kind of SSD than I even realized existed…  a caching SSD which looks a lot like a funky RAM chip.  While I was fiddling with machines yesterday I cracked open my laptop and saw the little SDD chip… removed it… and then BOOM it booted.  In fact right now I am writing this blog post on the laptop.  It seems perfectly fine, but just boots a little slower.  Spending today patching things up to see which of the laptops actually performs faster.  My theory is it will be this one because for the games that COULD support SLI it ran quite a bit faster.

Demon Hunter

Demon Hunting

As far as gaming goes, yesterday I spent my day piddling around in Diablo 3.  For some reason I got the desire to start a new character and as of last night I got it to 40.  I had never really played a demon hunter before yesterday, but I have to say I kinda dig it.  I am playing a largely degenerate build where I am doing whatever I can to keep up the ability of Rapid Fire.  I have heard this ability becomes less awesome as gain levels…  but for the time being it is an insane machine gun ability that whittles down mobs quickly.  Mostly this all came about as I was working my way through farming materials by doing bounties.  I figured I might as well get the benefit of leveling as well, so I rolled a new character and once I hit 10 proceeded to spend my time doing bounty after bounty.  This seems like an insanely fast way to level a character.  Not sure how much I will actually play the demon hunter in the long run, but for the time being it is a fun diversion.  I am not really sure why I am so drawn to Diablo at the moment.  There are things I should probably be doing in Final Fantasy XIV, and other things I should be doing in Wildstar.  However for the time being this seems to be the right amount of interactivity.  Diablo I can just shut my mind off and play, and that seems extremely intoxicating at the moment.  It also lets me hang out downstairs and watch stuff on the chromecast, because I guess I need the relaxation.

 

Short Fiction Friday: Prodigies, Part 1

[Another installment of Short Fiction Friday, about a few NPCs from my current Shadowrun campaign. This and all future entries will be written on the spot, please forgive a lack of editing, this is all one pass. Enjoy! If you like the art, while I’ve used it for my NPCs, credit goes to http://tapastic.com/series/fisheye — the comic that’s the source of these characters.]

Short Fiction Friday: Prodigies, Part 1

art credit: http://azizkeybackspace.deviantart.com/art/Team-Fisheye-Placebo-Render-469508734

Alice missed crème brûlée. Once a month, if she’d gotten good grades, her parents would take her out to a fancy restaurant in Harvard Square Upper. She would read the menu, read about the restaurant in wonder as she always had. It was called Finale, and according to the story in the menu, it had been around for almost 75 years. It had vanished in the mid 2020s, but had been revitalized a decade later by an elf who’d remembered it from his college years. She loved the story, that a restaurant could have such history and endure through so much, and she’d always happily read it, pretending to her parents that she was deciding what she wanted to order, then order the crème brûlée, like she always did. While she waited for it to come, she’d look around the restaurant.

Finale sat on the edge of the massive plate atop which the higher-class citizens of Boston lived. Its awe-inspiring view drew Alice’s parents, but she was always more interested in the interior. It had beautiful glass chandeliers and glasses in interesting shapes, and she didn’t like the reminder that she lived atop a massive plate over the rest of the city, she just wanted to enjoy her dessert. Her parents would get something her dad called “ice wine”, but it wasn’t anything like the heavy, sour red wine they otherwise drank. It was a clear, peach color, and if she’d been really good and gotten really good grades, she’d get a little taste. It was sweet, but hinted at flavors she was still too young to really understand. She’d found it, once, on a job at some posh businessman’s apartment. It was the same as what her father always ordered, and seeing the price tag on the bottle reminded her of everything she’d given up. She’d never be able to afford even a glass of it, much less a bottle. She hadn’t been able to resist having a taste.

Short Fiction Friday: Prodigies, Part 1

Ken was the one who’d figured out what she’d done, a few days later. She’d left DNA evidence on the bottle when she’d had a sip, and it’s how the police got information on them. She never figured out how he knew; that was his knack– knowing things. Alice’s knack was a lot less subtle. She was good with the elements. Her instructors at school called her a “pyromantic prodigy”, and she’d quickly spread from fire to other elements. She’d been told that people who were particularly gifted with one element generally had a hard time learning an opposing one, and she took it as a challenge. Just to prove a point, she passed her second level apprenticeship tests as an aquamancer, three years earlier than the school had ever seen before, using an element diametrically opposed to what she’d seemed most attuned to. Prodigy was an understatement. Her parents had been thrilled, particularly when she’d been invited to the Oxford Academy for Gifted Magi at an unprecedented age. She’d gotten to eat TWO crème brûlées that time.

Oxford was far away, a boarding school, and Alice was initially terrified of the place. It didn’t help that, at age twelve, she was younger than almost every other student there. There was only one student younger than she was, an electromancer named Nicholas, who wanted everyone to just call him Nick. He was eleven, and the two of them bonded quickly. Nick was cheerful and vibrant, and Alice enjoyed his company. Together they weathered some awkward years, as they both grew into teenagers. She was there for Nick’s first heartbreak at the hands of another boy, and he helped her work up the courage to approach a slightly older student and ask him to a school dance.

The older boy was named Ken, a mage like the two of them. Alice never had to ask the question; she just walked up to Ken and he looked straight at her and said “Yes, I’d love to go with you”. It was a shock, and her expression must have given something away, because Ken was almost immediately just as flustered, apologizing for being too forthright and looking abashed. He explained later that it was his knack, knowing things, but that sometimes– particularly when he was nervous– he had trouble remembering what he was already supposed to know and what he wasn’t. After the initial awkwardness, Alice and Ken became fast friends, and Nick helped Alice pick out her dress. A little later, he helped her pick out a second dress, a much fancier, much more elegant one. When she asked why, he winked and grinned. “For prom… eventually, you know? Ken’ll love it.”

Short Fiction Friday: Prodigies, Part 1

Alice, Nick, and Ken became fast friends at Oxford, and Alice learned more about their histories. Nick was from a poor family, and Nick’s penchant for accidentally damaging their limited electronics meant that they put him in a foster program for mages very young. He’d proven he had incredible talent, and Oxford had picked him up, offering him a free ride. He’d taken it, knowing it was his only hope to get out of poverty. Ken didn’t talk much about his family, but Alice had pieced together that something horrible had happened to them, and that he was at Oxford because he’d somehow survived whatever had happened and was paying for it with inheritance money. Alice introduced the other two to her parents when they came to visit, and they became her companions during breaks, spending it at their parents’ home in Boston.

It was on one of those visits that things took a turn for the worse. Nick was having trouble in classes, and Alice and Ken were trying to teach him. Frustrated and defeated by the advanced electromancy skills he was supposed to have mastered (and that Alice had been able to effortlessly pick up while studying with him), he revealed that he only had a middling talent with electricity. He confessed that it had been a front the entire time– his real talent wasn’t elemental at all. He could dive into the wireless Matrix and manipulate it, changing things like a masterful hacker, entirely without any sort of equipment. He was a technomancer. His parents had kicked him out of the house when they’d found out that he was “some kind of freak mage”, and no one he’d spoken to had any idea what kind of magic he had. People were suspicious, and whenever anything inexplicably went wrong while he was around, anyone who knew his power would cast blame his direction. He used the computers at Alice’s home to show off a bit of what he was capable of, showing them some internal corporate memos that he was able to seemingly conjure from nothing.

Ken’s response was immediate. His gaze from behind his glasses became glassy, the look Alice had come to associate with Ken’s unique form of magic. Almost dreamily, he spurred the other two to action, getting them to grab their bags, still only partially unpacked, and move. They’d learned to listen when Ken got this way, and followed his instructions. He got the two of them out of the house mere moments before a corporate black ops team descended on Alice’s home. Chased by the sounds of gunfire and rising flames over her once home, Alice’s life was shattered, and she and her only two friends vanished into Boston. After a life of living in the sunshine, above the Boston Plate, Alice disappeared into the Boston underworld, the shadowy world beneath the Plate.

Short Fiction Friday: Prodigies, Part 1

–to be continued–